Funny One Liners-Really Short Funny Jokes.
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1. Robert Schmidt 13 (5/9/2010)
    My uncle's an airline pilot ... kinda makes it difficult to hold the bottle though... When my Dad came home last night, my mom fainted. Don't tell anyone I sai
2. Robert Schmidt 12 (5/9/2010)
    I'm in Champaign, I listen to the great music on Rock 107, and when out of town ... they mail it to me. Last week the candle factory burned down. Everyone jus
3. Robert Schmidt 11 (5/9/2010)
    The museum boasted owning the original version of Beethoven's unfinished basement. What are imitation rhinestones? If a word in the dictionary were misspelled,
4. Robert Schmidt 10 (5/9/2010)
    You can always get a job in international affairs because 90% of everything happens in a foreign country. I called the Census Bureau to see why they hadn't sen
5. Robert Schmidt 09 (5/9/2010)
    Horses just naturally have Mohawk haircuts. Every day, the hummingbird eats its own weight in food. You may wonder how it weighs the food. It doesn't. It ju
6. Robert Schmidt 08 (5/9/2010)
    Called a blind date to set up a meeting at a restaurant. I said, I'll be the one driving the Mercedes and wearing a Rolex. Never found her, but when I got ho
7. Robert Schmidt 07 (5/9/2010)
    The Bermuda Triangle got tired of warm weather. It moved to Alaska. Now Santa Claus is missing. I went to a fancy French restaurant called Deja Vu. The head
8. Robert Schmidt 06 (5/9/2010)
    I Xeroxed a mirror. Now I have an extra Xerox machine. I took a course in speed reading. Then I got Reader's Digest on microfilm. By the time I got the mach
9. Robert Schmidt 05 (5/9/2010)
    Droughts are because God didn't pay his water bill. Is tired old cliche one? if you tell a joke in the forest, but nobody laughs, was it a joke? The sign said
10. Robert Schmidt 04 (5/9/2010)
    I saw a want ad. Light housekeeping. They said, Here, change this bulb. I said, I'll need some friends. I moved into an all-electric house. I forgot and le
11. Robert Schmidt 03 (5/9/2010)
    I wear my heart on my sleeve. I wear my liver on my pant leg. I still have my Christmas Tree. I looked at it today. Sure enough, I couldn't see any forests.
12. Robert Schmidt 02 (5/9/2010)
    My friend Sam has one leg. I went to his house. I couldn't go up the stairs. The sky is falling. The sun is rising. The sky is falling... No, I'm tipping o
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