Answering machine jokes-Really Short Funny Jokes.
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1. Answering machine message 162 (5/9/2010)
    Shhh! Don't talk, just listen! Meet me at the corner of Broad and Main and bring the girl. (CLICK)
2. Answering machine message 160 (5/9/2010)
    You have reached the CPX-2000 Voice Blackmail System. Your voice patterns are now being digitally encoded and stored for later use. Once this is done, our co
3. Answering machine message 158 (5/9/2010)
    Leave a message or I'll send 30,000 volts through your phone. I am an electrical engineer. I can do that.
4. Answering machine message 156 (5/9/2010)
    Hi, I'm not home because I've gone on a BLOODY RAMPAGE! When I get home, and CLEAN OFF THE BLOOD, I'll be sure to give you a call. If I haven't ALREADY COME
5. Answering machine message 165 (5/9/2010)
    Hi, this is Jim. Welcome to my Fun Phone Line, where you can talk to my answering machine for only $0.95 per minute! Please leave your credit card number at
6. Answering machine message 163 (5/9/2010)
    After the tone, leave your name, number, and tell where you left the money. I'll get back to you as soon as it's safe for you to come out of hiding.
7. Answering machine message 161 (5/9/2010)
    Please leave a message. However, you have the right to remain silent. Everything you say will be recorded and will be used by us.
8. Answering machine message 159 (5/9/2010)
    This is Dan Cassidy's answering machine. Please leave your name and number, and after I've doctored the tape, your message will implicate you in a federal cri
9. Answering machine message 157 (5/9/2010)
    (Italian Mafia-style voice:) I can't come to the phone right now. Me and Guido are trying to stuff a body in the trunk. I think we're going to have to size
10. Answering machine message 155 (5/9/2010)
    Hello! I'm on a four state killing spree! WATTA YA WANT?
11. Answering machine message 154 (5/9/2010)
    Bob here. I'm home right now, I'm just screening my calls. So start talking and if you're someone I want to speak with I'll pick up the phone. Otherwise, we
12. Answering machine message 152 (5/9/2010)
    Hi. I'm probably home, I'm just avoiding someone I don't like. Leave me a message, and if I don't call back, it's you.
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